Stoneybrookite

the best friends you’ll never have

From the beginning, the tagline of this site has been “The best friends you’ll never have.” This is a tongue-in-cheek way of revealing a kind of sad truth about myself, which is that apart from a brief spell in sixth grade, I didn’t really have friends until I was in ninth grade. I think that my childhood experience matches up pretty well with the typical INTJ experience. I loved to spend my time reading, writing, and creating, and had little use for other children. I couldn’t find other kids on the same wavelength.

Instead, I read a lot, and I read a LOT of BSC. So that’s where the tagline comes from.

I fantasized about having a big group of friends. But looking back, I’m wondering that if I were a middle school student, and I was invited to join the BSC–would I?

On the one hand, obviously I would. I had no friends. It would have been a dream come true for me to have had people to hang out with, eat lunch with, partner up on group projects with, who would have chosen me for their team in gym class even though I sucked at sports. Just think how much worse Mallory’s “Spaz Girl” experience would have been if she hadn’t had the BSC to support her. That’s what my middle school experience was like.

On the other hand, as I mentioned, I’m an INTJ. I need lots of time for my own weird projects (like this blog and the wiki!). The BSC was a huge demand on the time of the sitters. Also, one thing I found out later is that, at least for me, baby-sitting is a hard job, and nowhere near as enjoyable as I thought it would be. Parents who limit television-watching make it extremely difficult for sitters, because then it’s ALL the kids want to do. But I digress.

I mean, obviously, with my situation in middle school, an automatic group of friends who would stick by me would have made a huge difference in my life. But all that baby-sitting… Eh. Who am I kidding? I would have joined in a heartbeat.

8 Responses To This Post

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SJSiff said, August 30th, 2014 at 10:27 pm

I baby-sat (and now I nanny), so I probably would have joined too. Three of my friends and I had a brief-lived art club with officers and dues like the BSC.

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greer said, August 31st, 2014 at 3:32 pm

@SJSiff Cute! Were you inspired by the BSC?

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Elizabeth said, September 2nd, 2014 at 9:36 am

In eighth grade, no way. I was more like Shannon, always had a lot of activities and spent a lot of time on schoolwork, and I would never have had time for all the BSC-related stuff. Of course, that assumes that you are talking about me spending my one real-life eighth-grade year as a member of the BSC. If I had my own personal time warp, maybe I would have gotten bored of Girl Scouts and drama and cross country and soccer and given the BSC a whirl for a year.

In sixth grade, maybe. I wasn’t as busy then. But seeing as I don’t live in Stoneybrookland, I don’t think I was qualified to be a babysitter in sixth grade.

I think it depends on why you’re asking the question, though. I mean, if the BSC is an activity or a hobby, I would have had problems with that but I could see how some would enjoy it. If it’s the basis for friends, well, I don’t know. I’m not sure I would like to have my only group of friends be as insular as the BSC.

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greer said, September 2nd, 2014 at 10:20 am

@Elizabeth It definitely seems like you’re not really allowed to have much of a social life outside of the BSC, unless you’re an associate member like Shannon.

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Eowyn said, September 4th, 2014 at 4:09 pm

To respond to Greer’s question, yes I would have. Did Abby have any prior sitting experience before she joined? It seems like she only got invited because she was good with kids.

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greer said, September 4th, 2014 at 6:44 pm

I don’t recall her having any experience, but hey, they were desperate :)

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SJSiff said, September 5th, 2014 at 3:47 am

Late reply, but yes, Greer, we totally were inspired by the BSC! I was the treasurer (and later treasurer of the drama club and my eleventh grade class). I’m good at math, but I don’t like it like Stacey does. The friend who came up with the idea of an art club was president. The other two members were sisters…I think the older sister was secretary and the younger was vice president. We met when there was some art show on TV and used dues for supplies. I think we met a dozen times or so.

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greer said, September 6th, 2014 at 2:05 pm

@SJSiff, that’s awesome! I always wanted to start a club.

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