I found this on youtube. It’s a song by a Czech band called SandWitch entitled “Mallory on Strike.” I’d like to think they were inspired by Ann’s novel, which I have been reading lately.

I have a confession to make. Despite the fact that it is universally mocked for being a terrible, terrible book, I really like Mallory Pike, #1 Fan. Yes, it is quite strange how someone who writes stories about sneaker-wearing field mice would suddenly believe that only real-life experience begets good fiction, but still, I like this book a lot.

I like reading about Mallory’s internship with Henrietta Hayes, even though she messes it up. There was a thread on the BSC livejournal recently which posed the question whether #1 Fan was a response to all of the BSC fans’ questions. I.e., why do I keep on receiving form letters, how much of your own life is in the BSC, etc. Which is an interesting proposition, although it kind of promotes the idea that if you’re a fan of the BSC, you can just show up at Ann’s house and she’ll hire you for a job as a personal assistant, even if you’re, um, eleven years old. I do believe that Ann was still living in New York City at the time, and it’d be a bit more difficult in a doorman building to actually reach Ann’s apartment door than just simply riding your bike up to the front door, like Mallory does.

One thing I find slightly annoying is the Kids Can Do Anything Club. I don’t like do-gooding children all that much. The play is hilarious though, especially how Mallory was just so… thick when she was writing it. Ranessa? Delaware? Um, ok Mallory.

I also like how the BSC formula–Kids make anything better!–is not bought by Mallory’s teacher. Although I’m not sure that Mallory’s teacher is reasonable in his rejection of her proposal; it seemed at least as legit, if not more, as Jessi’s plan to type up the plots of some ballets and interview Mme Noelle. Oh well, plot device!

Do you think this book sucks, or do you actually enjoy it, like I do?

I received Best Friends today, so that’s what I’m reading now and what my next blog post will be about. But if you want to read along with my Stoneybrookite Book Club, the next BSC book I will write about is Logan Likes Mary Anne!.

It always confused me why Jessi and Mallory only had one mystery each. After some lengthy discussion on the top at the BSC boards, I finally found the answer. Jessi and Mallory, at eleven years old, were simply too young to participate in any of the dangerous crime-solving that the much older thirteen-years-old sitters were doing. Even in the Super Mysteries where Mal and Jessi have chapters, i can’t recall them doing any real stakeouts or anything–just keeping the mystery notebook up to date or doing some library research. Despite the total disregard for safety throughout this spinoff, such as the fact that even when someone tries to burn someone’s house down Claudia doesn’t bother to tell her parents about the scary stuff that’s happening to the BSC, at least they left the young’uns out of it.

Mallory and the Trouble With Twins was my favorite BSC book as a kid. I loved the Bellairs shopping trip, and the idea of the twins’ clothes expressing their personalities, and the presents they got for their birthdays. Rereading it now, though, there is one passage that just really bothers me:

Mrs. Arnold showed me into the living room, where an assembly line had been set up on the floor – fifteen paper bags with clown faces on them, fifteen packages of neat-looking barrettes (apparently, all the guests were going to be girls), fifteen sets of Magic Markers, fifteen tiny clip-on koala bears, fifteen candy bars, and fifteen beaded necklaces.

Boy, goody bags had certainly improved since I last got one. When we were little, didn’t goody bags just have, oh, peanuts and a pencil and maybe a plastic ring in them?

Let’s do a little Chapter Two here. Mallory is eleven years old in this book. The twins are having their eighth birthday party. That means that three years ago, Mallory was busy also being eight and attending eight-year-old birthday parties. I don’t think that society would change so drastically in three years that peanuts, a pencil, and a plastic ring being the goody bag standard to suddenly the standard being barrettes, koala bears, candy, markers, and necklaces. I mean, unless the society had a revolution/the ruling government collapsed in those three years, which Ann had never mentioned so I’m going to go out and a limb and say that a revolution had not happened in Stoneybrook.

Now, if Mallory was a baby-sitter in college, I would say that yes, this passage makes sense. I know of some fans who pretend the sitters are older when they read the books, because things just make more sense if you age the sitters by three years. I have a hard time believing that say, Haley Braddock, being only two years older than Mal and Jessi, would really respect them as much as she does (not counting the Haley of Claudia’s Little Liar, who respects no one). What is it about eleven that makes it the “adult” age in Stoneybrook? Are Mallory and Jessi just an exception? But then how does that explain things like chin-tipping?

This is making my brain hurt.

I just finished The All-New Mallory Pike . This book is a favorite of mine, probably because I myself am a Boarding School Survivor. I love reading about her boarding school adventures as they remind me of my own, although her school sounds much more luxurious than mine. Everyone knows that in the joy of the boarding school experience, suffering is inherent. Anyway, I also like reading about Mallory about Riverbend because I like Riverbend Mallory Pike. She is more confident, and no longer playing the “Junior Member” role. I like Mallory being recognized for her kindness, for her brains, not just being the big sister or one of the two who can’t sit at night. I would have loved to see a California Diaries-style series about Mal and her friends at Riverbend. Why has no one written fanfiction about her boarding school life? When asked about what they think happens to the BSC post-graduation from eighth grade, and in many RPGs, Mallory ends up coming back to Stoneybrook for high school. Personally, I see Mal staying at Riverbend till college. What do you all think on this issue?

Also, over at The Miss BSC Pageant, Mary Anne Saves the Day has emerged victorious in the poll for most popular BSC book. All I have to say is: EW. This is one of my least favorite BSC books. I don’t like the fight. I actually don’t really like fights in BSC books in general. They make me feel really uncomfortable, like when you’re hanging out with a couple and they begin airing their dirty laundry in front of you. Awkward. The only one I like is Stacey vs the BSC, because instead of feeling uncomfortable I just bask in the glow of Bitch!Stacey. I also like the book Mary Anne’s Makeover despite the fights, cause there’s so much fashion and gossip. But Saves the Day has neither fashion nor interesting gossip, and Stacey is just kind of pathetic in it. I also don’t like it when Dawn gets so mad at Mary Anne at this one, although I do feel like it’s indicative of their future relationship, which will include lots of petty bitch fights. But yeah. I was disappointed by the results. What do you think about the results?

I wrote a post and wordpress ate it. Super.

It was about how Mary Anne is how Ann wishes people see her, but inside she feels like nerdy, mouse story-writing Mallory. Mallory is the only BSC-er who is not attractive. Mallory is the repository of all of Ann’s insecurities. And that is why Mal was sent to boarding school.

Thoughts?